::Somehow or rather I can't let you go,
Somehow or rather I want you to know,
I can't give up on you and I don't want to,
But things are at point I just have to,
I wish that the time was right,
Somehow I always hoped it might,
But when I saw myself start screwing up,
I knew then and there it was enough,
I chose the wrong time to fall for you,
It's something I always knew,
Sometimes I wish you'll maybe find out,
Why I like you and what I'm all about,
I want to stop this madness which I am in,
Yet somehow every time it stops,
It begins....
::

.:Fireport blogged on 10:45 PM:.

::Just saw her online haha
She's been so busy working, this friend of mine. I'm not naming names and none of you had better dare to name who she is before I decide to slaughter all of you. And if you know who are you, ummm hi =) again.

I really question myself whether is it OK to want to give up on a girl as good as she is. I mean I would love to have her as my girlfriend, but she only wants to stay as close friends. What can I do then other than just accept the fact I'm not going to get her. I could bitch and whine to all my friends for the next 2 months about not getting a girlfriend and not getting this girl and then emo a tad bit by fighting with my classmates for no reason and get beat up for the fun of it.

But then again I bitch and whine all the time and I'm starting to try to stop the bitching and whining since I find it stupid and annoying. So yeah I'm going to pick up sparing and start studying more into Jujitsu and Krav Maga. Both which are very effective street fighting techniques.

Just a little background on these 2 fighting arts. Jujitsu is the core martial art that helped formed Judo and Aikido. Basically it is just the two of them combined and then some more. Krav Maga is an art formed by the Jewish after WW2 and has been the core practice of the IDF ever since the Jewish State of Isreal has been formed in the 1950's. Both are full of painful grapple techniques and are quite useful haha

I need to go for work now.

Adios::

.:Fireport blogged on 7:19 AM:.
...
::OK ok I guess you peeps are sick of hearing me say I'm single.... and tada!!!!
I am totally not bothered by what you think but since its my brother who is sick of it I totally will try to stop it like now=)

Yeah I got not much to post right now since my life is uneventful due to my prelims which again may I emphasize is boring since it is so typical that I may even try to fail it if my pride wasn't on the line here. Ahh but who cares

I totally wanna pick up sparring to try to improve myself. I want to learn how to fight much better than I am now and not to be afraid of getting hit. I need to learn all this you know? For what reason?You'll find out soon enough next year.

Yeah I wrote a Poem today
its called Would You

Would You

If I said I love you,
Would you believe me,
If I was homeless,
Would you receive me,
If I was lost,
Would you find me,
If I was in a figment of your imagination,
Would you perceive me,
If I was dying,
Would you save me,
If I cried,
Would you console me,
If I saw you,
Would you see me,
Now that I'm here now,
Would you?

Written by: Edward Cheang Xuerong

Thanks for reading eh
haha
hope you enjoyed it
Ciao
::

.:Fireport blogged on 11:48 PM:.
...
::HAPPY 250th POST
lol
Yeah I know it's kinda lame to do something like celebrate my 250th post but then again it isn't since I am an avid web comic reader thus such things are important to people like me XD.

So anyways I apologize for not updating constantly due to my every growing laziness and the inability to keep a habit unless I'm attached or desperately need some type of anti-emo thingy to keep myself going and now to stop this side note and go to the main stuff.

On sat, me hX and Al went to town to go do some walking around and looking at stuff (no money T.T). We were at HMV when Al started to look at the Boybands in the Jap section while me and HX were discussing why I have this unexplainable liking for Matsumoto Jun and the reasons why I'm not gay even though I've been single for half a year. Anyway Al picked up a SMAP album and went "oh!". That caught our eyes and we went over and HX was all like "OMG Alvin jumped over a boyband". I nodded in sinister delight as we went over to a few other bands and watched him jumped over almost every other JE band except Arashi (HX: WHY NOT!!!!??? T,T) much to HX dismay. Had lunch at Yoshinoya that day and also spent most of our time at Kinokuniya looking at song books while our dear lady picked up a lot of other type of books.

Thats for Saturday.

Sunday was my big day for my martial arts class. It was my grading. Nothing much to say about it but the sparring was fun. Seeing my friends battle was even better, the level Daniel had achieved was amazing. His speed and brute strength was beyond his stature and my friend Tian Ji was incredibly fast in dodging the punishing blows from his strong opponent who oozes in evil aura when he fights.(trust me it literately is there) All in all it was a good day at that time.

Tomorrow is my science pracs so yeah wish me luck all of yah
and to all a good night =)::

.:Fireport blogged on 11:56 PM:.
...
::Stop and Stare,
You think you're moving but you go no where.....

Thats the way I'm sorta feeling right now. I mean I just learned how to control and attach and detach my emotions. Kinda weird in a way since its almost inhuman to be able to do so somehow I believe I am not a human.

Then again I'm still kinda emoing the fact I have to study and to study I need to like a girl but then again I can't like a girl cause I need to study and that I don't think dating is the right thing for me now since I am not really financially sound and I totally need to save lots and lots of money and I need to get rich and I need to buy a lot of things.

And now I need to bath. Ciao::

.:Fireport blogged on 11:28 PM:.
...
::I have no idea why I'm even doing this blog post right about now. I should be in the shower but then I'm here typing this post.

I seriously think I shouldn't be liking any girl now. I should just give up on her and try to keep her as a friend instead of make things awkward and stuff. Yeah thats what I should do and thats what I'm going to do. I must build up a wall around my heart again from scratch. I must learn how to concentrate on the right things in life and not care about love and romance anymore. If I'm meant to be with a girl I guess god will send one on the way to me. I need a little time to think about what I should do next after this action.

Maybe I'll die soon enough. But I don't plan to before I become the genius of racing =)::

.:Fireport blogged on 8:42 PM:.
...
::Heya guys and gals I'm back for now and with almost nothing to post except for unhappy news which is private and I'm still not posting.

I got my new specs today pics coming maybe on my DP hahahah
Got nothign to say
Visit Ru Jun's blog
Link is on side
Ciao::

.:Fireport blogged on 9:22 PM:.
...
::Feeling slightly better today
haha
Maybe its a good sign.
Heaven sent an angel my way, I just need to convince her to stay....::

.:Fireport blogged on 8:45 PM:.
...
::Nothing really has gone by plan at all. Well at least I'm learning a new song today. The song is Grow Old With You by Adam Sandler. Its a song which I hope I can play for someone in due time. No particular someone but still I have someone in mind but I don't want to get my hopes up, so yeah I may like her a lot to the point that I'm crazy enough to go for her but I'm not getting any hopeful until I know that she likes me the same way too.

Yeah
I wanna grow old with you.....::

.:Fireport blogged on 9:30 PM:.
...
::To anyone who reads my blog
I'm sorry I haven't posted. My mind is in a mush.
I have nothing to say.
I have no excuse left
Just leave me alone for a while.
I need to be with my friends and the ones I love for a while.
I just need to live for a while::

.:Fireport blogged on 11:05 PM:.
...
::如何一位君子会爱上一位淑女
君子但不能爱上则淑女
我看了这一场戏就觉得不好
爱不能勉强过的
你会有什么看法呢?::

.:Fireport blogged on 9:18 PM:.
...
::I'm seriously in a dilemma.
A friend of mine is in love with some girl who is attached. I'd call it an infatuation but this is the first time he has come to me asking me to write a poem for the girl and
actually sat with me for the whole hour coming up with the perfect lyrics. I'm not going to show you what it is but the rough idea is that the girl is attached and that he liked her for a short while now. I see his effort but I don't see his result.

lol

I still do not have a girl I truly like yet so yeah guys no worries I'll still stick on to you guys like glue XD

So please tell me in my taggy whether its ok for a guy to like and attached girl XD::

.:Fireport blogged on 8:49 PM:.

::lol just taken a test online check out my results

Your dating personality profile: Liberal - Politics matters to you, and you aren't afraid to share your left-leaning views. You would never be caught voting for a conservative candidate. Adventurous - Just sitting around the house is not something that appeals to you. You love to be out trying new things and really experiencing life. Funny - You laugh often. People never accuse you of lacking a sense of humor. You don't take yourself too seriously.

Your Top Ten Traits 1. Liberal 2. Adventurous 3. Funny 4. Outgoing 5. Sensual 6. Big-Hearted 7. Athletic 8. Romantic 9. Intellectual 10. Practical

Your date match profile: Funny - You consider a good sense of humor a major necessity in a date. If her jokes make you laugh, she has won your heart. Practical - You are drawn to people who are sensible and smart. Flashy, materialistic people turn you off. You appreciate the simpler side of living. Conservative - Forget liberals, you need a conservative match. Political discussions interest you, and a conservative will offer the viewpoint you need.

Your Top Ten Match Traits 1. Funny 2. Practical 3. Conservative 4. Adventurous 5. Athletic 6. Sensual 7. Shy 8. Wealthy/Ambitious 9. Intellectual 10. Romantic

Take the Dating Profile Quiz at Would I Date You::

.:Fireport blogged on 8:02 PM:.
...
::Just finished watching Initial D Fourth Stage for like the third time. lol
I'm starting to love it more, cars and driving that is.
lol
I'm feeling better today and these few days. Thanks to Ru Jun and some others lol thanks a lot for your support!!::

.:Fireport blogged on 7:04 PM:.
...
::Yo peeps now using Vinodh's laptop to post this post. Amazing how my fingers adapted to its keyboard easily. Just finished playing basketball with them on NP campus. They are presently bathing while I'm in the "tuckshop" with Hao Lin. He's playing warcraft while I'm doing this blogpost listening to Fall For You from Secondhand Serenade.

Just heard some sob story from Vinodh about some jerk of an ass. I won't go into details but I tell you if you heard it you'd want to kill the bastard so bad it'll do you pleasure just to think about it. As in the murdering part of course.

Umm V's back gtg post more at night::

.:Fireport blogged on 1:51 PM:.

::Sad to say today is not much of a difference from yesterday.
I seriously need something to perk me up and change the way I feel about a lot of things.
I always seem to be mixing up a whole bunch of my emotions
And screw the proper paragraphing
I'm not in the mood.
I feel tired.
I want to sleep.
But I don't want to.
HER FACE APPEARS IN MY HEAD EVERYTIME I CLOSE MY EYES!!!!.
Its not scary
but it makes me feel very hurt
A girl who is masked appears in my head.
Taunts me about not being able to find love
not being able to find her.
Its torturing me.....
I CAN'T SEEM TO STOP IT!!!
ARGHH!!!!
I'm sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo freaking annoyed by it.
GARGH!!!!
I need some esprin::

.:Fireport blogged on 12:29 AM:.
...
::Hey people and my imaginary audience. I'm sorry bout the emo entry before this one. I was really freaking crapped up and pissed off at the fact that there isn't any girl who catches my eye at all. To all the people who know about "her", I figured out I didn't really feel romantically attracted to her, I just felt connected. Plus the fact that she's perfect in every way and I'm not really just creates a gap between us.

Dear me, I seem to have been waking up at 5 for the last 7 days and sleeping in some unholy hours. Its not taking its toll on me yet since I get some rest in the afternoon but still its starting to get tiring to continue doing this. I really resent the fact that I am a horrible money saver and I don't know how to save money. When I get money I just spend it, its not that I don't know there are limits but its just that I don't really fear not having it and that has to change. So yeah tomorrow will be like the last movie day in the next 2 months.

Continuing in this post, I've been reading this comic called Alien Dice lately and to my surprise the main character , Chelsea Reid, used to have a crush on David Duchovny of X-Files Fame. You'll know him as Mulder. I've been reading up his profile trying to understand what makes him Mulder and what makes him such a philosophical actor and also why I always felt him and I almost had the same personality traits , negative wise anyways. Well he did come up with a quote I totally agree with and I'll share it at the end of the post. All in all, he is truly a great actor and also a mighty fine person to know I guess. I wish I can meet him someday.

To all my friends out there and to all the people who actually read this blog. I'm going to ask all of you a favor. If you would like to see a change in the skin please leave a comment in this post telling me what type of theme you would like on this blog. I am undecided on a new skin and I find this skin pretty boring. Please be reminded themes such as emo, broken heart, sadness, sex and any other thing that offends me( which is pretty few) will be ignored and also possibly burned in hell. Offenders will be tracked down by me and my shadow minions and their oxygen will be systematically drained from their surrounding with their souls collected by a collector and also be offered to heaven or hell for cheap prices. Just joking. XD

And lastly to end this post of the quote I promised from David Dunchonvy.
"If you're smart, you'll always be humble. You can learn all you want, but there'll always be somebody who's never read a book who'll know twice what you know." - David Duchonvy

Like I said I agree to this quote a lot and thus gives me more reason to study more and more everyday. And to all of you now Au Revoir .::

.:Fireport blogged on 6:54 AM:.
...
::I just finished watching Notting Hill. As good as the show maybe I feel like a total piece of crap. I mean a book seller can get an actress wife, I'm a 17 year old still maturing teen and I can't even get a half-decent girlfriend!!?!?!

Its not that my ex-girlfriends weren't decent, mind you they all were, its that no matter how hard I try there isn't a girl I am fond of now. There isn't even a girl which I'm even half attracted too. And that scares the living daylights out of me. It just isn't right, I ain't no wanking Welshman or some sick perverted Chinese fuck head. I gave up on all that a good long time ago.

Why the hell am I as unlucky as a cow with 7 udders, or a horse with 4 legs and is hung high. I totally can't think of anything to do right now. I have lost all focus in my life and I have no idea what to do with it anymore. I guess this is what they call "When Life Comes and Fucks You UP".

WOW!!!! It is so great to have it this way eh? FUCK YOU LIFE YOU CAN COME AND LICK MY BALLS AND KISS MY ASS. You know what? I've had it up to here *points at head* with your stupid fate and shit ass logic about destiny. You can wipe my shit with that crap and still get clean water. I AM GOING TO PERSONALLY CONTROL MY DESTINY FROM NOW ON AND IF I DON'T MY NAME IS JEBADIAH JENKINS AND IT FUCKING AIN'T.

I DO NOT CARE ABOUT WHAT PEOPLE SAY ABOUT ME ANYMORE, NBA ALLSTAR OR FUCKED UP CHICKEN OR ARROGANT BASTARD YOU CAN ALL KISS MY ASS IF YOU THINK THAT WAY ABOUT ME. I DON'T GIVE A SHIT ANYMORE.

And all I wanted was for somebody to maybe come my way and help me out of this personal dilemma....::

.:Fireport blogged on 9:59 PM:.
...
::I guess its time for me to update eh?

On Saturday, me and the anti-noob group went out for a swim then rushed to JP to catch The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor. I tell you its amazing.

On Sunday, went to work, went back home end of story

Yeah I'm a lazy bastard. For pictures of Saturday go check out the Anti-Noobs blogs lol if you know who they are.

I have a lot of private matters I want to say but its not safe to speak of here or anywhere else. I wish someone could come and save me from this misery I'm feeling. I guess I'm just as weak as they always said I was....::

.:Fireport blogged on 7:36 PM:.
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